things I’ve learned since being added to my high school reunion Facebook group.

I graduated from high school in 2008, which-if you’re keeping track-means that next year will be TEN WHOLE YEARS. It’s pretty hard for me to wrap my brain around it, because sometimes it feels like no time has passed at all. This weekend our former class president circulated a “survey” on Facebook asking about potential 10 year reunion locations for next year, because apparently the planning process needs to start a full 18 months in advance. On top of it, today I got added to an entire group dedicated to the planning of our ten year reunion. Here’s some thoughts that have gone through my head in the last 24-48 hours since realizing that this is a thing that’s happening:

  1. Where do I want our reunion to be? Is hell an option?
  2. Because that’s what it’ll be. Hell.
  3. They really put “apple orchard” as an option of where to have it? Seriously?
  4. Eh, whatever. I’m writing “nowhere”. Hahahah I’m funny.
  5. I can’t believe it’s been almost ten years since I walked through those sweaty, disgusting hallways.
  6. I am so not going to this thing.
  7. You’d have to pay me a lot of money to go.
  8. Oh God there’s an entire Facebook group dedicated to this.
  9. There’s no way I’m joining it.
  10. OK, fine, I’ll join it.
  11. OH SHIT. Somebody posted “I’m not going because I hate 98% of you”!!!!!!
  13. Oh shit she called someone a bitch. Maybe this group will be better than I thought!!!
  14. …until the admin turns off commenting/posting without “prior approval”. Fuckin lame.
  15. Why do we need a reunion. Literally, why do we need it? That’s what Facebook is for.
  16. Oh how cute, someone posted “I thought we might have grown up by now but I guess not”. I wish I could reply “I thought you would’ve stopped posting about how wonderful your ‘hubs’ is and how thankful to Jesus you are by now, but sometimes life throws us a curveball”
  17. The amount of people posting about how excited they are is somewhat surprising.
  18. But then again, these are the people who thought those “.08” shirts were funny.
  19. Come to think of it, I wonder how long it’ll be until that gets brought up.
  20. Two hours! Wow.
  21. They’ve got that infamous picture of all the douchelords in the office smiling because they got “busted”.
  22. You just know they still talk about that to people. That’s their party story.
  23. I wonder if they consider that they peaked at 17? Probably not.
  24. Looking at this picture fills me with hatred the likes of which I haven’t felt in ten years.
  25. Yeah I’m not going to this fuckin thing.

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